It's not what I really want, but it's all he has to offer. He's filled with turmoil and heartache and regrets, but for two hours every Wednesday all he feels is me. How much I desire him, how desperate he makes me, how much I'd like things to be different between us. Real.
He used to be my best friend back before he got married. And now? Now, he's a young widower. It'd be wrong on so many levels to expect something more from him. So I give him what he needs. But I know I can't keep this up. I've already given him my body, my soul. I want him to have my heart. It might drive him away forever, but that's a risk I'm forced to take.