Conversational Rape: Emotional Language, Conditional Love and Invasive Communication Patterns
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Conversational Rape: Emotional Language, Conditional Love and Invasive Communication Patterns
"Behave how I want, or I’ll withhold my love from you...my money...my approval. Forever!" Harsh words, maybe less blunt but always with the same intent: demonstrate the upper hand over us, put on the squeeze. Or maybe: "I'm in such pain because you will (or won't) do it." Guilt heaped up, to bend us to an intimidator's will. We live in a toxic environment. Polluted air, contaminated water, additives and adulterations and frankenfood. But most damaging are toxic conversational broadsides against us. People jockey for advantage, put us down, play the shame and guilt cards, intimidate us with fear of being assaulted or abandoned. Words are the most powerful tools the human species has created. They inspire and comfort, influence us positively. Or attack and destroy, take people down, wage economic warfare and corrupt political theater. * Taunts remembered from a playground can cost you success in business today. * Parental upbraiding may now bankrupt your ability to relate, nourish those you love. * Snarky jabs from friends may lead you to undervalue yourself, discount your dreams, leave you a pincushion attracting pains, false beliefs and negative emotions. Verbal aggression, these de-humanizing experience evoke the same psychological consequences as physical assault, a rape…one executed with that most effectively invasive and potentially sadistic part of the human body: the tongue. A conversational rape. We are conversationally raped everyday: by commercial messages and politically correct indoctrination, by authorities who want to keep you in your place -- out of their way. And like any rape victim, we carry psychological scars. Dr. Pat Allen has healed wounds for over 38 years as an MFT. She knows firsthand the damage caused by ploys of intimidation and induced guilt. And knows how to heal those wounds. The tool she uses to help you is, ironically, words. "Beware your words, for they become habits....your character....your destiny…at the bank, the doctor’s office, in every enterprise in your life and every one of your relationships." You won’t be the same after reading this book. You will no longer be an unwitting victim of subconscious conditioning and lifescripting. Change words you speak to change the way you think, Dr. Allen’s groundbreaking training will help you use words with new potency, heal psychological wounds of conversational rapes, and negotiate authentically for all you want in life....and get it. Androgenous Semantic Realignment™ builds on Freudian/Jüngian principles of psychotherapy, Eric Berne’s Transactional Analysis and Fritz Perls’ Gestalt Therapy, focusing on pathologies which cripple our self-image and ability to relate. WANT® Training, based on ASR and grounded in neocortical science, lets you feel good about yourself and win without sabotaging yourself by threatening or demeaning others, or other “gamesmanship.†It will revitalize what you even think is possible. Making minor tweaks in your speech patterns will actually renew your thought patterns. We think in words, and changing how we think and speak automatically changes how we act. Once you accept that many conversations you have had throughout your life have been subtly, inexorably driving you insane, you can set out to use words in a new way. You can use words to drive yourself, and the people around you, sane. Rape is a traumatic experience. Your mind and body wants to heal itself. No matter what has happened in the past, you are not doomed by experiences, and not hardwired to fail. You can upgrade your mental "hardware" to foster new amazing experiences, create new neural connections to take advantage of opportunities that may have seemed inaccessible in the past. And you will now have the tools to let go of negative beliefs and subconscious stumbling blocks and embrace positive attitude and energies. And knowledge to renew aspects of any area of your life. Foreword by Jim Hallowes, founder-HighlySensitivePeople.com